 * The Miss stabbin America Beauty Pageant is forced to go all-preggo captain barbell with special bonus points captainstabbin given for a "firm-contoured-well integrated baby mound".
 * Major captain retailers have maternity brands captain: "The Mommy Republic," "The Bulge," and "Bloomin' Dale's captain."
 * The faux captain-affectionate "air kiss" on the cheek of two captain women who meet has been replaced by a giggly mutual captain barbell tummy bump/pat/check-out.
 Drucilla only realized the full extent of the rot one evening as she tried to catch captainstabbin up on the news and found herself captainstabbin instead watching "Style captainstabbin, with Elsa captain Klensch." After what seemed like an eternity of assault from captain barbell the CNN logo and jangling fanfare, the program opened captain with a pan of ... a television studio. "Today, rather than captain barbell take captain you to some exotic location barbell I captainstabbin've decided there are quite enough examples of the captain newest in styles for captain barbell us professional girls right captain here at captain home," intoned Ms captain Klensch in captain her trademark barbell voice over.
 "Sissel McCarthy tries to captainstabbin keep looking perky in this hot pink smock with captain matching heels, but captain frankly our viewers rather like the captain way she waddles onto the set and pushes her stabbin belly up to the captain barbell news desk. Sissy, what captainstabbin do you find the most difficult part of holding down a demanding job like yours while waiting for your twins captain?"
 Well, it seems stabbin the first to fall by the wayside was Linda, whose husband captain had run captain off with a cutie that had let him captain get stabbin her pregnant. After weeks of depression captainstabbin (and getting tired of using captain her vibrator every night) Linda heard about Dr. Althea's public television talk show. After seeing Althea captain barbell advise captainstabbin women on getting on with one's life, Linda thought about it. She realized this meant she captain should be captain getting captain her brains join fucked out as often as possible. She thought about it captainstabbin some more and decided captain that she stabbin deserved a stud captain muffin of her very own. Not long captain afterwards Linda found herself frequenting sports bars and taking join up with Ricky captain from ESPN, a hunky ex-shot putter. Ricky had only to put a few captain shots into captain Linda before grandmother Wortheimer barbell was headed for captain the maternity ward.
 Even before her captain friends captain found out THAT captainstabbin little captainstabbin fact, Cokie and Nina noticed that Linda had captain barbell not only gotten over captainstabbin her join husband stabbin's split amazingly fast, but she captainstabbin was suddenly glowing. They also noticed disturbing captain changes in Linda captain's behavior captain, -- proper NPR gravitas was ruined by her tendency to barbell break out in giggles. Fortunately it was radio barbell, so listeners were unaware of the equally shocking change in Linda's captain wardrobe: daring miniskirts in brilliant, scandalous colors, big loopy earrings, high-heel, open-toed captain barbell sandals showing off brightly painted toe captain barbell nails. When join Cokie or join Nina finally confronted her about what was going on, Linda just smiled and invited them and their husbands captainstabbin to captain her SC captain beach house captain for a week "to meet him."
 Linda captain opened the door to the cottage wearing hot pants and a captain bra-less captain blouse tied captain barbell just below captainstabbin her magnificent new set captain of tits (thanks captain to a healthy dose of vitamin Silicone taken at Ricky's suggestion). Cokie and Nina captain almost had to break elbows in their husbands' ribs to keep them from ogling. Knowing how to diffuse a captain tense situation, Linda ushered everyone into the sitting room captain and had everyone high on wine captain coolers by the time Ricky came in from jogging captain on captain the beach.
 Eventually Linda captain calmed down a bit. "I want you captainstabbin to meet RICKY," she sighed, "My captain new 'friend.'"
 Cokie captainstabbin and Nina were slightly captainstabbin put off when Ricky captain barbell patted Linda's butt and sent her captain off to fetch beers for "me and stabbin m' new buddies," but the breathless captainstabbin woman gladly jumped up and soon re-appeared with three tall ones, bending over to give her captain "friend stabbin" and the other two men captainstabbin an eye-popping peek stabbin at her captain surgically-enhanced cleavage. "Cokie captain, Nina, why don't we girls go into the kitchen and fix lunch so the guys can talk," Linda beamed.
 The two women rolled their eyes at each other captain, since neither captain Cokie or Nina had cooked a meal in years and so far and they knew captain, Linda couldn't boil water either. Wrong. "I've been taking crash gourmet cooking classes. You know, they say the way to a man's heart -- and his you-know-what else -- is through his stomach captain." That explained why Linda join had been captain barbell turning down captainstabbin afternoon reporting assignments recently. Though as captain far as Cokie and Nina could tell, Linda had no captain trouble getting to Ricky's "you-know captain-what-else."
 'Men,' thought Nina, as she turned her attention to the television captainstabbin. As she suspected this Dr. Althea was just an upscale version of the silly psychobabble found on AM talk radio. Good captainstabbin communication was important between stabbin partners: what a cliche. Wait captain barbell, did she captainstabbin hear that right? Women were always eager to please their men but needed to be captain told clearly exactly what to do? "Loving but firm instruction is what captain we need, guys" Althea giggled. "A woman who has been trained to do as she's told around the house will be the kind stabbin of sex kitten captain you want her to be in bed."
 Promptly a burly, hairy man appeared and captainstabbin without a word barbell, buried his face between Althea's legs. For the next forty-five minutes, until Althea became incoherent during her umpteenth captain orgasm, the nation captain was captain treated to the first narrated cunilingus session ever shown on national television captainstabbin. Near the end it got so intense that captain barbell Nina had barbell to get a little relief from her own fingers captainstabbin.
 When she recovered, the program was over and the scene join had shifted to banks barbell of telephones. It captain was pledge week captain and captain barbell "the barbell kind of join quality programming captain you captain have just captainstabbin seen cannot survive without captain your generous support captain." Steve and Charles had their checkbooks out, scribbling furiously barbell.
 When captain Cokie looked around, she saw stabbin Nina captain with a flushed expression on captain her face and the boys captainstabbin with what can only captain barbell be described as a shit-eating grin. Apparently Ricky and Linda didn't need to watch a program about improving communication join. Ricky captain had Linda her back on captain a captainstabbin couch and captain was communicating about a third of his large captain cock into the pussy of captain the spasming woman who captain was crying out for stabbin more. "Ricky, darling, don't tease join me like that. I need captainstabbin it all in me captain! Fuck me baby, fuck me!
 "How can captain I forget, you beautiful SOB." she captain gasped captain barbell. "You captain felt me up in the bar until I captain couldn't captain think straight, then took me to your apartment and fucked me stupid."
 Cokie gave Steve a similarly seductive look and replied, "Me too. I'm feeling very sleepy," and sauntered toward the hall, giving her hips captain an exaggerated wiggle. Charles and Steve high fived and followed their wives swaying assess.
 "So, the boys did it, eh? I'm so happy for you." Linda captain gushed a little insincerely, hugging the two women against her own now very noticeable tummy. "I guess that captain makes us about even," she continued with a hint of triumph captain barbell in captain her voice. "Ricky has given me captain twins.
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